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What We Talk About

Spoiler alert: this is an episode about consistency as much as it is about getting more attention with what you’re doing.

Crissy Connor will tell us how to get started with visibility in a sustainable way that feels great AND is designed to generate real results. She’ll break down how to get into the right mindset, her trick for making content work across all platforms… and she’ll even tell us the story of 200 live videos in just one month.


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Our transcript hasn't been proofed, so there will probably be some errors. Sorry about that!

Alyson Lex 0:03
We all know that being visible being out there is a good thing. But what we don't all know is one, how to do it to how to get over all the fear surrounding it or three, how to leverage it into profitable opportunities. And so when we met the visibility Queen herself, Chrissy, Connor, we knew we had to have her here to talk to us about exactly that. So Christy, thanks so much for being here with us today. Thank you for having me. I would love to let you if you would like get on a soapbox for a minute and just talk to us about why visibility is so dang important. Why should we focus on that?

Crissy Connor 0:50
Thank you for letting me get on my soapbox, because it's like my favorite thing to do. It is so important because so many people literally post and have a hope strategy. Like they literally just hope this post is going to turn into a sell. They are forgetting about the relationship building that should be happening, they are forgetting about the impact and influence that should be happening through their social media content, they are forgetting about the even the personal growth that happens when we choose to get on video, there is so much magic that happens and that we're missing out on because we are choosing to go the easy route, right and just post a photo or post a graphic. Instead of showing up as ourselves our authentic vulnerable selves on video we miss out on our audience getting to see who we are, know who we are, feel relatable to our audience as we come as we are in perfectly, and a hot mess sometimes. And that's okay. And so when we when we miss out on that visibility, I feel like it could fast track our business so much quicker if we choose to get on video, but so many of us don't do that. And we're just like, we're I feel like we're losing I feel like we're always running a race that we feel like we can't win, because we choose to skip that step.

Jennie Wright 2:02
So people I think tend to like to skip that step because they might feel uncomfortable. They might not know how to get visible or how to be on video and how to do those sorts of things. What do you tell them? If people say to you, I'm just not comfortable? Do you say show up anyways? How do I do that? What are your steps to get people sort of comfy with this whole process? Okay, well, first of all, I'm an introvert 100% before I'm a little shocked right now,

Crissy Connor 2:32
I totally am. I am an introvert, I get hives normally, like they creep up my neck like and it's embarrassing. I say I'm a lot. I'm a perfectionist recovering. I had a fear of what my friends saw, I had a fear of other experts seeing me and saying I didn't know what I was talking about. I had all these fears, right. And these things that really truly held me back. And what I had to do was first I started out doing cheater Facebook Lives is what we'll call them, because you can go Facebook Live to only me and nobody else would see it. And so that's how I really got myself comfortable. But really I had to get over myself. When I say I'm an introvert, I have fears, I get hives, those are very I statements right there about me. I didn't create this business to serve me. I created this business to serve and help other people. And when I literally took it outside of myself, you know, being a mom and a wife and it we were ingrained to help other people right when I took it off of myself and put it on who can I serve today? Who am I doing a disservice to today if I choose not to show up? It was a game changer for me. Did it mean that I was showing up every day immediately? No, but I worked towards it. I had a purpose. And I just thought to myself if I can help one person, if every video I put out if I just helped one person? Would it be worth it? No. It's always been Yes. It's always been Yes. And that's why I keep showing up.

Alyson Lex 4:02
I have somewhat of a follow up question based on what you just said about the if I can help one person, it'll be worth it. One Yes. I love that. But what about when you're not getting the feedback that you've helped somebody? What if you're posting and you're just getting crickets and you're not getting that dopamine hit of the positive reinforcement. What then?

Crissy Connor 4:25
So we are in a society that we love instant gratification and I talked about this all the time. We love Amazon today shipping. We love these things, right? We love having doordash and, and groceries delivered to our door. Here's what I know, most of my audience. They're introverts. They don't give me the instant gratification that I want, right. But I know I can look at my analytics and I can see people are watching. I have people that reach out to me that walk up to me in a grocery store and say, I love your content. I love what you teach, and I don't know these people. I have Have no idea what their name is, but they feel like they know me. So it is something called parasocial interactive. And think about growing up when we were younger. And we had we were fan girls, right? We were fanning of a movie star, a band or something that we felt like we knew them, because they showed up all the time. That consistency breeds fans, they may not always be loud fans, but they are there. I've had people reach out to me a year after they started watching my content, and said, I've never told you this. But I just want you to know, you helped me get over my fear of video, and I'm visible now because of you. And to me, that makes it all worth it. It's not going to happen overnight. But with consistency, you will start hearing those words and you will start hearing people reach out to you and they'll hop in your messenger, and you will get some gratis, you will get some Instagram suffocation. It's just not the way that we want it. Because we are just that type of society, right? So I think if you can just be patient and be consistent, you're going to see that instant gratification show up eventually.

Jennie Wright 6:05
You said my favorite word. always my favorite word consistency. Allison knows this. Every time somebody says and I like to jump on my soapbox about it, she has to

Alyson Lex 6:13
talk about how she's going to get a tattoo of it. And she has to talk about how it's the best thing ever. She loves it. So actually, I'm going to take that opportunity to interrupt my co host because I wanted to share a little bit about some therapy that I've been doing. Because I may or may not have asked that last question very selfishly, I was talking about me, I like the dopamine hit. And my therapist, God lover, helped me reframe it, that instead of celebrating the reaction, celebrate the action. Celebrate getting it done. In Yeah, I'm totally making that a quote is celebrate getting it done, rather than the result that it'll give you. So kudos to therapy, because I have it written on my board, I keep looking at it, it's it's been a little bit of a game changer for me is celebrate that I'm doing it rather than what I get from it. I love that

Crissy Connor 7:18
I love that I've always taught people that visibility and relationships are like two of the most important things in building a business. And it's the same thing if we build a relationship with an expectation and return. We aren't genuine, right? So we can't expect anything. We're literally we just want to be friends with somebody, right? If anything comes out of it, they become a customer or a client, or they refer somebody to us, we end up collaborating, that's just a bonus. But do it for the friendship with no expectation tie to it, the same thing with video and showing up and you're going it's going to rock your world. I'm just telling you, it's going to rock your world. As long as you're that that C word, you're consistent with it, you have to keep showing up. Knowing that it's eventually going to happen. It's just not going to happen probably on your timetable. Exactly.

Jennie Wright 8:02
That's fantastic. When I started a couple years ago, my partner was like you need to do weekly Facebook Lives. And I was like, but nobody's gonna show up. He's like, No, no, just do them. And so I started doing weekly Facebook Lives. And for the first I don't know, four weeks, I wasn't really see I get onesies and twosies. And I was like, really, I'm doing this like 20 minute or 15 minute Facebook Live every week and one person showing up, this is really not worth my time. Weirdly, the number started to increase as I was doing it. But on top of that, I had people referencing me and emailing me or even commenting and saying, I watched the thing that you did like from six months ago or whatever it was actually kind of speaking gig like a paid speaking gig from the fact that I had done those Facebook Lives. So doing it with consistency is 100% the thing, but I have a question that sort of begs at the fears of a lot of people. What about the people who say that you have to do you have to show up in all the places all at once the Instagram, the Facebook, the tech talk to this to that? What do you tell people because I kind of that they'll freak you out?

Crissy Connor 9:05
Absolutely. So this is what I say. We're gonna say consistency a lot. I'm just going to tell you, it's gonna be out there. So the first thing I tell my audience is, number one, don't get on another platform until you're consistent on one. There's no reason for it. But number two, there's this thing called weekend work smarter, not harder. And if we show up consistently, we can actually delegate out and someone can exceed what I call exploder content, they can explode our visibility. So what I do is I literally show up on Facebook Live because it's the easiest type of content to create. I push go live, and I start talking. My assistant takes my content, she transcribes it, she creates it into smaller videos, she creates graphics from it, and so she can create up to four pieces of content a day, as long as I show up and do a video three to five times a week. And that has been a game changer for me. But if you're like I don't have an assistant and I haven't delegated yet, I used to do this all myself. And that's how I maximize that. So but when you get an assistant, it makes it a lot easier. And that's how I can show up. I can do one thing on Facebook and multiply it on LinkedIn, and Instagram. And wherever I want to be, throw it up on stories, you know, because every platform has stories now, but also maximize where you're at first, be consistent there. And you only need to be on the platforms that your audience is on. And another thing, don't be on platforms you hate. Like, if you absolutely hate Tick tock, don't be on Tick Tock. If you hate Twitter, don't be on Twitter, because people are going to see that because you're not going to show up and engage with them, which is also what you need to be doing if you're posting content on a platform.

Alyson Lex 10:47
One, yes, I am not shy about the fact I don't hate Twitter. I just don't understand it. So I avoided like, I would say the plague but that's probably not very timely in 2021. But I avoid it. Like the spider in my bathroom shower. I just don't. Don't go there. So are you doing those Facebook lives every day and then repurposing them? How often? Are you going live and creating content? Well, almost every day?

Crissy Connor 11:20
Yes. At least five days a week? For sure. I don't know if you heard or if I told you. But I did. 200 lives.

Jennie Wright 11:30
In July. In June I Yes. I'm gonna say in like a year.

Crissy Connor 11:36
No, in 31 days, I did 200 lives. July was uncomfortable month. So I was raising money for a pediatric cancer foundation. I was pushing myself to be uncomfortable every single day. And the most I've ever done in one month was 115 lives. So I thought 200 sounded less scary and very uncomfortable. And it was

Jennie Wright 12:00
okay, that's insane. So my claim to fame, which now sounds ridiculous compared to yours is I did 53 Facebook Lives in a three and a half week period to promote a course. Which is now like, I mean, honestly, it's nothing compared to your 200. But my follow up is where the heck did you get all of your topics from? How did you make 200 Facebook Lives happen? Because after 53 I think I was starting to talk about doorknobs like I don't know what I was talking about anymore.

Crissy Connor 12:31
Okay, so first of all, I didn't go live just on Facebook. I have LinkedIn live, I have tik tok live. And I went live on Instagram. So I went live on multiple places. So sometimes I might have talked about similar things. But what I did before I even started this journey is I made a list of 200 topics. But here's what happens for me as somebody who is a, I create content all the time, I listen to lyrics in a song and I come up with the content or come up with a tick tock like this is the things that happen in my life. So I rarely even use those 200. But I had them to choose from everyday life is content for me. And so I would just talk about things that happened in my life. I would talk about how hard doing, you know, it started out being six videos a day to reach my goal. Then I forgot summer I went on vacation for 10 days. And so I missed some. And then it by the end of the month, I was doing 10 video 10 live videos a day not cheater. I couldn't go live on multiple platforms. At one time. It was a roll I made for myself. I don't know why I did that. I was crazy. I totally should have done multiple. But I did this crazy role for myself. So it was truly I was really just to that point. I was really talking to my audience. It was very personal. I mean, it wasn't about social media or visibility all the time. It was very like what's going on in my life, how it affects my business, and how I overcame XYZ like it was just very timely, very, very timely. And then I did I did do a video every single day recapping all the people because I had 150 people who got uncomfortable with me. And so I recap that everyday like what they did, I didn't tell their names because some of them were very, very uncomfortable things. And then what we had raised for the nonprofit, we ended up raising 50 $500 for pediatric cancer, which was huge. So every day I gave an update on the uncomfortableness and then the money that we had raised just to keep that top of mind to my audience.

Alyson Lex 14:25
I love that and you your thing about personal life reminded me of a YouTube video I watched and I think it was Ashlyn Ashlyn writes. She's a copywriter and she talked about creating a story vault where when things happen, just jot it down. So you can remember it later and it doesn't have to be fleshed out it can be in a journal, right? If your journal or write it in your journal this happened, and flip through when you need ideas. And then this exact thing that Jenny's talking about I just want to mention, Jenny and I to create a magnet to solve that problem as well. Because, and I use it every single time I have to go live, I do a weekly show in somebody's group. And every week, I'm like, What am I going to talk about today? That's not 200 in a month, by the way, it's once a week, and I struggle with content. And so I referenced this list that I can personalize to me. And that has been a game changer. Because you never want to feel like you're just like, I'm on the live right. So true. So true. So how can I create a plan? Other than the crazy 200 videos lives in July plan? Which that sounds like a whole nother episode? How do I create a plan for that consistency that I feel like I can handle and deal with?

Crissy Connor 15:51
Alright, so I'm going to tell you right now, then your best friend is Facebook groups. Like if you can go into Facebook groups where your industry people are, and search for the questions that they ask. Like, I've typed in social media, or I type in getting visible be seen those types of things. And people are asking questions, right? Especially, I'm an introvert. How do I get on video? That comes up a lot. So I literally search these questions in Facebook groups. And I that's my, that's my whole topic. I take exactly their question and create a video on it. Sometimes I also read answers that I don't agree with. And then I say and then I create a topic. A lot of people think you should XYZ. But here's why I disagree with this from my experience, right? So anytime we can position ourselves as an authority on what people normally say you should do, and what we do that positions us right. And that's a really good thing. The other thing I like is you can search, answer the public comm you can download up to two CSV files a day of what people ask. So it's what people are searching for on Google. And then I also love a resource called Cora calm. And that's a question and answer site. And, again, what are people asking? Because those are the pain points, right? Those are the pain points that you can get out to your audience. The other things I do is I listen and invest in myself a lot. So I'm listening to personal development, I'm listening to podcasts. This morning, I was listening to a podcast, I was like, Oh my gosh, I'm totally gonna go live and talk about how we lose momentum because we get too comfortable. And we don't keep pushing ourselves, right. And so these types of things just come and then I just like, in the moment a lot, I'm very passionate. So I just hit the go live button, and I go and I've learned from 200 lives. I'm not always I know, the podcast can't see me. But I'm not always put together like this. Sometimes I'm working out and I'm literally looking like a hot mess. And I'm gross. But I just go live. And I'd be my, my authentic self with the message that I have. Because my message is so passionate. Nobody cares what I look like, nobody cares what I look like, they care that I'm coming authentically and giving some tough love or giving them some inspiration or motivation in whatever is like, really like tearing me up right in that moment that I need to get out.

Alyson Lex 18:09
So one of the things that makes you and I'm very different is I do need to be a little more prepared to show up. So how do I come up with some kind of schedule? Right? Like I mentioned that I do a facebook live in somebody's group once a week. And how do I come up with, I'm going to do this on this day. And that on that day, in order to help me create that habit, create that consistency, because if I just rely on myself to go off the cuff, I may not do it.

Crissy Connor 18:40
So I do teach different ways to create content. And this is one way as we have seen days, right. And it's not necessarily like I gotta go say it's motivational Monday, but I want to give my audience a lot of motivation on Mondays, right. And maybe Tuesday, I'm going to give a tip, because it's Tip Tuesday, right. And on Wednesday, I'm going to give some wisdom some, I'm going to look back at my past and see how I have overcame something and really give some people some wisdom on that. So you can absolutely set up days like this in your mind. And then also, it's great because you're not necessarily putting it out there. This is just your own, like mental way to keep yourself on track. But if on Wednesday, you just want to like pour into people and teach them something that's blown your mind, you're able to do that too.

Jennie Wright 19:23
I really like that. It's a really good plan, especially to keep you going. I also and I are similar. I need an outline. Okay, I have a Facebook Live document that grows every time I do a live or an Instagram Live I add the topic, it's in bullets. I ever used that, by the way cuz I go back and I'll just repeat the same topic. But like, you know, again, which leads me to my next question with you, which is, once I get visibility, and I've done the consistency and we've gotten our tattoo, what do we do with it? How do we utilize it

Crissy Connor 19:57
so how you utilize it is By really positioning yourself, so another way that I like to put myself out there, like you mentioned before how you got I don't you got an interview or podcast, I can't remember I

Jennie Wright 20:14
got paid speaking gigs.

Crissy Connor 20:15
Yes, exactly. So the more we position ourselves and put ourselves out there, I even say sometimes I'm available to speak to your audience or your podcasts or be a podcast guest to speak about XYZ. And people see me showing up so much. They know that I'm prepared, they know that I can talk, they know that I can speak to their audience. So when we can position ourselves and put ourselves out there to get in front of other people's audiences. It's a game changer. Because typically, if you trust me enough to bring me and put me on your podcast, and bring me on as a guest, you have faith that I can teach your audience something you have put your trust in me to put me in front of your audience. What does that say from your audience, your audience is like, Oh my gosh, they really trust her. They really like they brought her on to pour into us. And it's a very quicker like, know and trust than then just seeing a video for the first time of mine, right? Because you're bringing me on, you're introducing me to your audience. So the more that we can position ourselves on guest opportunities like this getting on stages and things like that, and utilizing that visibility to push us there. It's another game changer. It's another layer to improving and increasing our visibility across the board.

Alyson Lex 21:28
Is it appropriate? Uh, do you call to an offer? In these videos? Do book calls do offer lead magnets? Do you sell courses? How do you make it? I'm going to totally throw out that move the needle phrase, move that revenue needle, which is such a cliche, and I've been using it a lot lately, too. How do you get that to happen?

Crissy Connor 21:52
So one of the things that I teach my audience now because when I started out doing video, I was really bad at this. Always have a call to action. Always. It doesn't mean I'm going to say goodbye my $27 product, go buy my high ticket offer? No, I'm saying comment below. I'm saying Follow me on YouTube, grab my free two mini courses. I'm like always giving them a little bit of value. Because when we teach our audience that everything we get call to action, everything we tell them to do that they're going to get value from it. It's a lot easier when we say, hey, my doors are open for my new, you know, program, because they've gotten so much value out of your free stuff, everything that you tell them to do, they've done and they've gotten rewarded from it, right? So then when we ask them to buy something from us, it's a lot easier, it's a lot easier. Yes, because they've gotten so much out of the free offer. So I believe every single video, every single time you put yourself out there, you at least do a free call to action because it also positions you into getting used to ask because we need to be told as human beings sorry, what to do. If you don't tell me to do anything, I'm gonna watch your video I'm gonna walk away, right? If you don't say go follow me or join or comment below. So I can send you my free XYZ. If you don't do that they're not going to do it, then they're not just going to think to do it again. My audience is a lot of introverts. So they don't want to draw attention to themselves. So they're not going to comment unless I tell them to

Jennie Wright 23:19
like you telling people what they need to be doing. I love doing that to do this, do that this is the next step. Allison does that too. Allison gets really clear. And she's like, okay, step one, you're going to go do this. And step two, now you're going to go do this. So I think that's really a really elegant way of doing it just being very straightforward with it. There's the, when I think about what you're talking about, one of the big things that comes to mind for me is how to shift your mindset around the fact that this is going to be work. And we talked about this a little bit earlier, where you may not see the instant gratification right away. But what should we say? Should we should we commit to, I'm going to do this for the next month. I'm going to do this for the next three months. I'm going to do this for the next six months, what's the mental commitment we need to make so that we don't quit on ourselves because as introverts or ambiverts, this is something that happens a lot if we don't see that, that sort of gratification for what we're doing.

Crissy Connor 24:21
So I like to do a couple different things. Number one, I am a big believer that what I do in this 90 day increments is going to I'm going to see come through the next 90 days. So whatever I do in one quarter I'm going to see in the next quarter so if I do nothing in first quarter, I'm not going to see anything in second quarter is just the way it is the 200 videos I did in July. I'm going to see in quarter four, what I what comes out of that I'm No I will not see until then. And I think if we can position ourselves and just remember that it's we're always 90 days behind of what we've done, whether that's something or nothing to get the results that we're always going to see it that way. The other thing I like to do is and helps me because sometimes as business owners, we're so focused on revenue, right? revenue is everything. But if we focus on the money if you if you have a money mindset problem or a money block problem, that's going to affect you if you're not where you think you should be. So what I like to do is call key performance indicators, KPIs, and create other things like, I'm going to do 20 videos in the next 30 days, like giving myself a way to, to track and most of us all love checking things off. So I would show you over here, there's this, my 200 board is still here. So I can't erase it yet, because I'm still in love with it. But I wrote one through 200. And then I cross them off every single time I did a video. And seeing that was gratification to me, because every row had 10 numbers, right? So every time I got to the end of the road, yes. 10 more videos now. Right? Like so I it was like motivation to keep going. But also to see that you're actually getting through something, you're actually doing it. So being able to cross something off, I think is huge. Whether you have a number of people that you want to offer your new program to, or a number of videos you want to do or number of times you want to show up? Or how many things can i repurpose this one video to like, that's a game changer too, because it's almost like a beat the GPS kind of girl. I don't know about you guys, but the more I can do, like if I can beat myself from the last time and instead of creating 10 pieces of content from this video, if I can create 15 then I feel like amazing, right? So play games with yourself and do things that motivate you. But crossing off I think is the hugest thing ever, because you get to see, it's it's a type of instant gratification, right, you get to see that you're actually crossing off you're making it through. And that's what helped me for the 200 videos. Because that that issue was hard. I'm not even gonna lie it was it was tough.

Alyson Lex 26:57
It sounds tough. And the beat the GPS, my husband got loving is not a beat beat the GPS kind of guy. And so the first time I drove somewhere with a GPS, I was like, by the way, that's not an estimate. That's a challenge, just as a heads up. And he's never been the same. So I can't thank you enough for sharing all of this. The the 90 days increment thing is, is probably going to be a bit of a game changer for me as well tell my therapist about it. I think she'll like it. But where can we find out more about you? where can our listeners get in touch with you.

Crissy Connor 27:33
So the best way to do that is to go to the visibility, Queen calm. Visibility has all eyes in it, by the way people spell it wrong all the time. I need to buy the wrong spelling too. But there is, um, there's my next challenges are there. I have free challenges all the time video challenges. There's a bundle that teaches you how to repurpose your content, how to be more consistent on social media and a daily visibility checklist. So it's just a bundle, and it's all free. I want that. Like a lot.

Jennie Wright 28:05
I think that's important. I think you just I think that's probably one of the best lead magnets I've heard in a long time, because it's all the checks all the boxes. And that's I think, just as a mark from a marketing perspective, I think that's just stellar. Alison, I really listen and take notes when we're doing these podcasts with guests. And we're no different with Chrissy because we've taken some monumental notes, we came up with a couple takeaways that we want to share. The first one that I have is starting to get comfortable with you know, with getting visible, the first thing is getting over yourself, you're never going to look exactly how you want, you may not even like the sound of your own voice. And you know, you didn't create this business to serve you, you did it to serve others. That's a huge, huge mindset shift. And it's something I do say this to clients as well. But you've got to take it off yourself and put it on the fact that you're serving others. And that's the game changer. And I loved that.

Alyson Lex 29:00
Thank you. big takeaway for me, which I quoted, apparently is to not focus on the reaction, to instead celebrate the action. And that the 90 day increments or create other goals that allow you to track your progress without relying on the result like the income, just that mindset shift of getting it done. Anyway, that is a deeply personal takeaway for me.

Jennie Wright 29:33
I also really enjoy the part where you said, don't get on a new platform until you're consistent on the one platform that you're already on. There's no point in trying to take on everything all the five or six are different things. And I even go so far as to break that down even with within Instagram. If you can't post the five different ways that Instagram has for you focus on one like if you can just do a post on a regular basis, and then you can able to you know you're able to do stories and then maybe you can Add an HGTV HGTV di g deep oh my gosh, I g t t. Yeah, I said, so if you can add those in bit by bit by bit, then you're not going to be as overwhelmed as if you try and take it all on at once. And I think that's important.

Alyson Lex 30:14
Absolutely. And I really, I'm going to take advice from what you promised yourself, you wouldn't do and I'm going to see how I can leverage streaming to multiple platforms at one time instead of having to do individuals. Because time is important.

Jennie Wright 30:38
I'll send you I always try and do this and it always makes me crazy. She's like, we're gonna go Facebook Live and Instagram at the same time. And I'm like, you can't do this with your head. Nobody can see me on the podcast, but I'm flailing my head all over the place because you can't look at the camera for one and then down for the the other

Alyson Lex 30:53
What the heck did I buy a cell phone tripod for

Crissy Connor 30:58
And on that note,

Jennie Wright 30:59
we're gonna wrap up today's episode. Christy thank you so much for being on everybody go and check the Show Notes for this episode. You can find all the different ways that you can connect with Chrissy and what she's doing grab that bundle. It's amazing I while she was saying it, I've headed over to the website and just had a quick peek you know peek at it. I'm so getting it. Make sure you grab that so you have everything you need to start getting visible. And absolutely make sure that you're following and are sharing this episode and others with your friends. Let them know that it exists. So you can help as many people as possible just like we want to. Thanks so much for listening. We'll be back again soon answering another big question.



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